What a season so far: wins, losses, draws - it's had it all.

Match report 29/11/14
Winston Churchill allegedly once said that “a good match report should be like a woman's skirt; long enough to cover the subject and short enough to create interest.” With that in mind, the following blur of nonsensical events should not be relied upon for anything other than the final score…
A warm day. A flat pitch. A seasoned oppo. A small white ball. All the ingredients were there for a great day’s hockey, and Marlow travelled to Banbury hoping to do the hockey equivalent of a Mary Berry lemon drizzle and cook up a winning recipe.
Banbury stole an early lead after 9 minutes but Marlow quickly levelled to 1-1 when C. Land danced into the D with feet faster than Usher on hot coals, and wrong-footed the keeper with a reverse stick near post shot. When Chris nabbed a second after 20 minutes to put Marlow 1-2 ahead the team were looking focused, composed at the back and threatening in attack. Could Marlow pull off an unlikely smash and grab?
Unfortunately the arrival of Chappers, perhaps seeking to revive the trend of successful sporting player managers, was instead the catalyst for a 10 minute collapse which was more soufflé than Souness. His scything ‘ball and man’ tackle and subsequent yellow threw Marlow into disarray and was capitalised on by Banbury. A combination of ill-discipline, ill-fortune, wheel-of-fortune and some fearsome ball striking saw Banbury score six goals in quick succession to lead 7-2 at half time and effectively end Marlow’s chances.
Spirits were still good as the second half began, with Marlow playing for pride and recognising that their attacking ability was superior to the Banbury defence. Both Lands, Ancliff and Rolfe were finding plenty of space and being well supported with intelligent play in midfield from Turner, Goodman and Gerrits (who since Dennis Berkamp’s retirement is now recognised as the new Iceman). However, the breakthrough went to Banbury who with characteristic counter-attacking pace on turnover and excellent fluidity of movement forced a third penalty stroke of the game from a goal-mouth Roberts tackle, despite it being a controversial, some might say incorrect, umpiring decision.
Enough about Banbury. The goal of the game followed after 50 minutes and gloriously it went to Marlow. Turner, demonstrating mad skills (not to be confused with breakbeat musician A.Skillz), drove into the D and rifled a reverse stick shot into the top left corner, leaving the Banbury keeper looking as clueless as a shortsighted newcomer to Cluedo with no cards, no instructions and no glasses. If the rules of hockey were more fair it would have counted for 10 goals and taken Marlow into the lead but life, as my father used to frequently remind me, is not fair.
After that, Ancliff and A. Land also contributed with well taken finishes but the damage had been done and Marlow made their way home dejected after a 10-5 defeat, reflecting on a lesson in men’s hockey from a creative attacking Banbury side. What a season so far: wins, losses, draws - it's had it all.

By Sam Roberts